Drumnadrochit Benleva Hotel Loch Ness Poker Every Monday

[Somerled]

3rd August 2009

12 Runners this week - sadly no Pecker as he's got Pneumonia but hopefully he'll be back soon - the till's certainly missing him even if no-one else is.

No word from The Burger either. Hopefully he'll be captured soon...

1st out was young Foxtrap. Caught bluffing early on he was down to just 700 chips and shoved with a flush draw, but didn't hit & Crocket's 88 was good enough. Crocket's joy was short-lived as he was next to depart, Mrs T doing the dirty deed.

Stripymccatpuss goes all in with 10 10 for his last 1650 chips (blinds had already reached 150/300) instacall from Al. He has the pocket rockets to send the pussy away for a bowl of milk. Or perhaps a lager top.

Meanwhile on Table 1.... a flop comes down 4 4 A, so Mrs T moves all in with her A 10. The Mighty Spurdog makes the call and has AQ. No miracle on the turn or river so Mrs T leaves us.

Then we have Thornback v 2 birds. ambreambre is all in with KJ, Wee Jessie is also all in with A7, sadly for them Thornback has them both dominated with AJ. Board comes 8 9 J K but the A on the river ensures 2 birds are gone with one stone.

Very next hand....

The Osprey moves all in for his last measly 1100 chips with KJ. The Wizard makes the allin too, for a wee bit morre, with JJ. Thornback calls them both and flips over his AK.....A on the flop means the others are drawing very thin indeed and no help arrives so another 2 players go and suddenly we're down to 4..BubbleTime!!

Al moves all in for 3175 with AKh...Thornback has a tricky decision but makes the call......and shows..... Good news for me as Al is bubbleboy saving me from that fate.

Sure enough I'm soon in danger but shove from the button with the monster that is K6o. Spurdog makes a rash call with A10c. Of course, the K comes on the flop and all looks clever until the A arrives on the river to send me packing in 3rd place.

Much too-ing & fro-ing in the HU battle but eventually Spurdog raises, Thornback shoves all in, Spurdog calls with A7, Thornback has 99.....no Ace appears so we have our winner. Well played Andy. Good game everyone and I'm sure we all hope Big Pete returns ASAP - we need some easy chips.
Derek was awarded to Foxtrap for his early donking of chips. Thoroughly well deserved.


1. Thornback
2. Spurdog
3. Somerled

4. Al
5. Wizard
6. Osprey
7. Ambreambre
8. Wee Jessie
9. Mrs T
10. Stripymccatpuss
11. Crocket
12. Foxtrap

[Somerled]

10th August - 18 runners.

Good turn out this week. No Osprey as he was "busy" with some French ladies on Skye.... ...but SickBoy Pecker returned.

McFilth made a return and got all his chips in in the first hand....but no caller....Filthy play indeed.
2 American guests and in the traditional on-line style one of them was first to depart donking his chips away in Level 1. To be fair he hit a flush only to be beaten by a higher flush so ul Ryan. Geordie Pedro, another Newbie, did the damage.
Last hand before the first break The Sloth is ALL IN with his A9, called by the Spurdog who just has him covered and has AQ. Crocket, playing Ubertight for some reason...folds his JJ and we're off to the flop...Q on the flop...and a Jack. So we lose the Sloth and Crocket is a wee bit miffed.

Pedro then "got bored" (i.e. impatient) and lost to quackers with her JJ. Then the 2nd Yankee (Jeremy) gets it all in with AK. Stripycat has the huge A7 and of course hits a 7 on the flop. I'm involved next...Crocket's all in and I'm on the button with 66....I call, he has AK. K on the flop. I'm oot.

Foxtrap AIPF with JJ, Carolyn calls with her K10. All looks good on the flop until a K on the turn is followed by another on the river to send Foxtrap back to his lair.

Spurdog AIPF with A10...Stripycat makes the call with THE BANIN...but clearly he doesn't yet have THE POWER as Spurdog outdraws him to survive.

Mrs T AIPF with AK, Carolyn (Wee Jessie) calls with JJ.....K on the turn saves Mrs T.

Pecker clearly still not on full form has been even tighter than usual...but is forced all in with his 68 v Stripycat's 97....the pussy gets a full house to send Pecker back to his sickbed.

Spurdog & Crocket AIPF....Bruce has Crocket ...Split pot seems a certainty....
Board comes... Uh oh.....Turn is ... the tension is excruciating as the river comes down.... Spurdog is out, somewhat cruelly. See I told you online poker was fixed..


Stripycat doubles up through Amber AK > AJ..Ambers down to 400 chips...

Al has 10 6 on a 10 high flop...he's Wee Jessie has 10 8 and makes the call...The 8 on the turn seals Al's fate and he's off to the rail.

Amber then goes all in for her last 400 with the German Virgin ...9 9 ...But McFilth has made the call with 8 7 soooooted and the board of 7 7 3 looks nasty, but the case 7 on the turn is just pure Filth!

Quackers ALL IN for 1350 with A6 McFilth has 99..Board comes 4 5 6 7 8..Eira gone.

Stripycat v Jessie...Board comes A Q 2 stripy all in with AJ...Jessie however has QQ in her pocket so Stripy departs.
In all the excitement I forgot to take a note of how MacFilth departed but I think it was at this stage, with something Filthy!

Mrs T then has K 10 v The Wizard's 99 (lots of German virgins about tonight..) and gets no help so the Wizard claims a scalp.

Bubble time....

Crocket has been moving all in a lot and does so again with K6 soooooooted The Wizard conjours up a call with 33 and they hold up to send Crocket packing.

Wee Jessie then has and the board comes she's Wizard has for the made flush and calls..there's to be no rescue for Carolyn so she's out in 3rd.

After a lengthy HU battle Thornback, who hasn't merited a mention all night thus far...battles into the chip lead and gets em all in with JJ Wizard has A8 and the J on the flop seals another victory for Andy. 2 in a row. Good effort.


1. Thornback
2. The Wizard
3. Wee Jessie

4. Crocket
5. Mrs T
6. McFilth
7. Stripycat
8. Quackers
9. ambreambre
10. Al
11. Spurdog
12. Pecker
13. Foxtrap
14. Somerled
15. Jeremy
16. Pedro
17. The Sloth
18. Ryan

[Somerled]

Oh, I forgot to mention that Foxtrap awarded Derek to Stripmccatpuss this week. With typical good grace and sportsmanship he left it behind...so Derek can taunt him from behind the bar for the rest of the week.

To be fair, Foxtrap's reasoning was somewhat flawed - awarding the donkey for someone playing the Banin. I shall have to punish the non-believer on Monday.

[Somerled]

17th August 17 Runners

Another decent turn out. Foxtrap's birthday too.

Early action.....Stripycat All In PreFlop....Quackers makes the call with AK....the puss has KK....no ace appears and quackers is gone.

C.D. (Commando Dave, formerly known as Common Dave) makes a true Monster. Quad jacks cracking the wizard's Pocket Rockets. Wizard a bit short now, CD a big stack.

Wizard AIPF with Lucky Larsson's (7 7 ) CD calls for a tiny portion of his monster stack with A8. The 8 on the river cruelly sends Alex on his way..

Mal.com moves in for 1625 after Pecker had raised to 300....Pete folds like a cheap tent.

I'm then all in for my measly 1200 with AJ (my best starting hand of the night. ) Mal.com calls with A6. No help for him so I get a double up.
Then Mal has 2 pair and is all in, but sadly Crocket has a well disguised straight which sends Mal straight...to the bar.

The Pirate Sloth it then all in and Stripy makes the call with an 8 7 soooooooooted. The Pirate Sloth had A5. An 8 on the flop and another on the turn means that James sets sail for the door....slowly..

Spurdog at risk.......AIPF with 99 Crocket makes the call with A10c and it's races time....2 clubs on the flop gives Crocket more outs. The turn gives him a straight draw so he now has about 63 cards he can hit.....but the river is a blank so Bruce gets a handy double up.

Spurdog raises to 2000 Thornback makes the call. Flop comes 8 10 Q Spurdog for his last 2k, Andy calls with JJ. Spurdog however has 88 for a set of 8's. The K on the turn gives the Thornback more outs and when I happily deal out the inevitable Ace from Space on the river it's curtains for Spurdog and big cheers all round. Well, from me anyway.

Wee Jessie meanwhile has taken out Al on the other table. We're nearing the final 9...Goth Tom has been quiet thus far, and moody of course, as is the Goth way, but now he's all in with his AQ as Pecker's forced all in with K7 (he's been trying to fold his way to victory again. ) The Goth hits a flush on the turn.

Now the Goth's woken up there's no stopping him....All in now with A10, Crocket makes the call with K10. No help for him so another scalp for Goth Tom.

Stripy all in as the blinds are creeping up. Osprey has him covered, just, and makes the call with A10. Stripy has KQc and its racing time. A and a 10 on the flop means Stripy's looking for the miracle J on the river and it doesn't arrive this time.

Wirvine all in aith A5, Osprey makes the call from the BB with A7. Wirvine needs to see a 5 but he doesn't so Osprey is now quite a big stack.

Blinds are getting steep now, especially when you have a pitiful stack like mine. So it's with K10. Thornback makes a rash and frankly ridiculous call from the BB after everyone else runs away scared, with 88. Another 8 comes straight out on the flop so I'm well and truly stuffed. Not even a bad beat story to bleat about this week.

CD gets his chips in with a pair of Queens, well someone from Brighton always likes seeing a pair of queens , sadly Wee Jessie has 2 pair (J's & 7's) to knock out our favourite Marine.

5 left & it's getting very exciting. Ish.

Blinds 700, 1400 Flop brings 6 6 2 Carolyn bets 1400, Thornback calls. Turn a K. Carolyn moves all in. Thornback calls for most of his big stack. He has K2, Wee Jessie has 5 6 soooooted. She's now the cip leader i think.

Thornback forced all in from the SB next hand. Fortunately he has 10 10. Sadly for him Wee Jessie makes a straight on the river with her A4 to knock him out so it's to be no hattrick for the Mighty Thornback. At least he can console himself with the pint he got for knocking me out.

Osprey all in with his favourite A9. Foxtrap calls from the BB with A3. All looking good until the 3 comes on the turn to leave the osprey spitting feathers.
All in next hand he is but trebles up. And again the next hand for 1800 (Blinds 1k 2k) with 2 3. 2 callers but 2 wee quackers on the board gives him a lovely 3 of a kind and another treble up.

All in again next hand with 5 5. Foxtrap calls with Q 10. K on the river gives Foxtrap a well hidden straight. So well hidden in fact that he tries to push the pot to the Osprey.

So we have our final 3 heroes...
Wee jessie all in with Aq Foxtrap calls with A8 but no more miracles for the Birthday boy who leaves £15 richer.

All in next hand with KJ. The Might Goth calls with K8 and it's all over. Wee Jessie is our champion. Sadly she won't be back to defend her crown (or should that be tiara? ) next week as singing is more important.

Foxtrap volunteered to take Derek home due to his efforts to try & lose a pot he'd already won. And quite right too.

1. Wee Jessie
2. Goth Tom
3. Foxtrap

4. Osprey
5. Thornback
6. C.D.
7. Somerled
8. Wirvine
9. Stripymccatpuss

10. Crocket
11. Pecker
12. Al
13. Spurdog
14. The Pirate Sloth
15. Mal.com
16. Wizard
17. Quackers
12.

[Somerled]

24th August

A real Loch Ness MONSTER turnout this week - 20 runners, including the return of the Poker Babes Cardtrixx & Abakus.

No prizes for guessing who was out first. The Pirate getting all his chips in on a Q high board with AJ, sadly for him Foxtrap had AQ and made the call. Bye Bye Mr Pirate Sloth

Almost immediately theres news from the other table. Quackers has cunningly slowplayed her pocket Kings. Sadly for her the A on the flop has made Stripycat's A9 the winning hand and off she goes for well deserved coffee and a fag.

Al gets em all in on a AQ8 board, and has wee quackers, but Foxtrap has A8 for 2 pair. Al gone.
Mal.com, who is now a marked man goes next getting into a scrap with The Fisherman. There's only ever going to be one winner in that situation.

MancScouse is having a bad night. Not only are his beloved Scousers getting royally humped by the Villa, but he's a bit short and shoves with A2. Goth Tom calls, Spurdog reraises, Thornback rereraises. Goth Tom rererereraises or something. Anyway, all the chips are in and Thornback has everyone covered, and has KK into the bargain. Spurdog has an unlucky QQ Goth Tom has 66. All looks good until the miracle 6 on the river gives Goth Tom a lifeline with the sidepot but thornback takes the main pot to knock out Spurdog in 14th & MancScouse in 15th.

Break time. And soon after its time for me to shove with KQ. Foxtrap calls from the BB with A9 and theres to be no happy ending for me.

Mrs T is all in with 66 but Cardtrixx has AA and the rockets hold up.

Meanwhile Abakus has lost mot of her chips with her 2 pair losing to Pecker's straight. Next hand she's all in with 77 but the lucky larssons are beaten when ambreambre's KQ hits a K on the river.

Osprey & the Fisherman are AIPF. Ospreys JJ not enough against the AA and we lose the bird.

Goth Tom makes his move with 10 J but sadly for him Pecker, who's been unusually active tonight, has AA.
Next victim for Pecker is the stripycat, no further details on this one but no doubt he was very lucky.

Cardtrixx has let herself get very short and is all in on the BB with 9 4 . Pecker has QJ sooooooted and makes a lucky flush on the river.

ambre's at risk AIPF with 9 10 h v Crocket's KK. Flop brings a flush draw for ambre....but that's as good as it gets and off she goes for the long walk home to Milton.

Blinds are getting juicy now and Thornback's AIPF with A8 for nearly 7k, but the Fisherman has KK and they hold up.

Crocket's AIPF with 33 and Foxtrap calls with AK. It's off to the races we go and the board comes 10 J 3 turn's a 4 and then an unnecessary 3 on the river gives Crocket quads and I think the best hand of the night.

Foxtrap's short now and is all in next hand, Crocket knocks him out and we have our wee bubble boy.

AIPF Crocket has A8, The Fisherman K2. Flop is an uneventful 6 4 9 but the 2 on the turn sends Neil happily dancing around the room until the 8 comes on the river to knock him out in 3rd place.

HU battle lasts a wee while until all thi chips go in on the flop when Pecker Has J8 for a pair of Jacks, but Corcket's flopped the straight to take down the prize. Wel played indeed.

Foxtrap was too scared to award the donkey to anyone else so I've got custody of Derek for a week.

1. Crocket
2. Pecker
3. Fisherman

4. Foxtrap
5. Thornback
6. ambreambre
7. Cardtrixx
8. Stripymccatpuss
9. Goth Tom
10. Osprey
11. Abakus
12. Mrs T
13. Somerled
14. Spurdog
15. MancScouse
16. The Wizard
17. Mal.com
18. Al
19. Quackers
20. Pirate/Sloth

[Somerled]

31st August 12 Runners

Not such a good turnout this week but good fun nonetheless.
Spurdog scoops and early pot with a masterfully player Banin (ALL HAIL!!) which is good enough to exempt him from any donkey antics this week.

It's still level one and already we have a man overboard! The Wizard has failed to cast a spell over his table. Not too sure on the exact details but it wasn't a horrendous beat therefore he was playing too rashly for the early stages and has earned himself a week in the company of Derek.

Mal.com has allowed many of his chips to wander off and is all in on the BB with his measly remaining stack. He has A7 crocket has J3. The J on the flop is sufficient. And we are down to 10.
Osprey s AIPF with AK, Spurdog sadly has AA and the aces hold up.

Quackers is AIPF with K5, as you do, and Mrs T calls with AA. Board comes....K 4 8 K 7. Fairly horrid.

Then Foxtrap gets AA and stripycat's ALLIN with 10 10. 10 on the river is very very sick.

Mrs T was left very short after the earlier misadventure and is AIPF on the BB with Q2. Foxtrap has K4 and neither player hits so we lose Mrs T in 9th.

5 limpers preflop and I have 66. Board comes 10 6 4 (2 diamonds) Crocket moves all in and it's folded to me. I reraise all in just in case there's a flush draw lurking behind. Crocket has the 10 but nowt to accompany it so he's out in 8th.

Board is 4 4 8. Pecker moves confidently all in with K8. Andy makes the call and has A8. We lose Pecker in 7th.

Blinds have reached 350/700. Andy minraises. I call from the BB with 6 9. Board comes 7 7 8. I shove all in. Andy, unfortunately for me, calls. He has A4 on a flush draw. Turn is another 7 and the river a beautiful 8 for the split pot.

Foxtrap moves all in. I have AK and have him covered. I call. He has A8 soooooooooooooooooted. And the wee * * hits an 8 on the flop to leave me shortstacked.

Stripycat AIPF with KJ Quackers makes the call with Q 10. Board comes 8 9 5 J Q to give Quackers a straight as she dodges yet another bullet. Stripycat is a wee bit short now.

I'm all in on the BB with 10 7 soooooooooooooooooted. Spurdog has A3. The A on the flop is a bitter bitter pill to swallow. As Duncan Bannatyne would say, I'll tell you where I am, I'm OOT.

AIPF Thornback with KJ and Foxtrap has AA again, the wee f r. Thornback is out in 5th.

Spurdog AIPF with A8. Stripy makes the call with 10 10 and the 10 on the turn seals Spurdog's fate. He's our bubbledog tonight.

Stripy's all in from the button with 87h. Foxtrao has JJ this time, the wee b d. Stripy is oot. We're HU and foxtrao has a 2:1 chip lead. But not for long as Quackers uses her many many years of experience to good effect. Foxtrap gets frustrated and moves in with QJ. Quackers makes the call with A7 and Foxtrap fails to hit, for once, so the wee fella is out in 2nd. QUACKERS IS THE CHAMPION!!.

[Somerled]

7th September 2009

17 Runners (16 + a late arriving Goth) And the Poker Babes are back!!

Quackers fails to defend her title in fairly spectacular style. She loses nearly all her chips early doors to Foxtrap who's managed to contine his luck from last week by flopping a set. Al takes her last 125 chips soon after to claim a lovely bounty.

Abakus loses her pocket money fro this week by making a straight flush on the river to beat her dad's flopped full house. That'll teach him to slow play a monster hand.

More family troubles on Table 1 as Mrs T gets into a chip fight with Mr T (aka stripymccatpuss). Mrs T comes off worst and has to retire to the bar to lick her.......wounds.

Just before the break I get dealt lucky larssons (77). Thornback limps,so I call too, ass does Al, then Cardtrixx moves all in for her last chips from the BB, Thornback makes the call and I have 2k left. What to do?? I decide to shove as the blinds will be up to 150/300 very soon. Al folds and Thornback thinks for a while before making the call with a mere AQ sooooooooooooooooooooooted. Cardtrixx has A 10 sooooooooooooooooooted so I'mnot in terrible shape.....until the Q flops and the river gives Cardtrixx a straight. So she'sstillin and Thornback has my bounty. The lucky * *! Was I correct to shove? Answers on a postcard please. Right, enough whinging about my poor play and back to the reporting......

After the break we have Stripcat AIPF with 7 7, the Fisherman makes an appropriately fishy call with AQ. A Q on the turn leaves Stripy in his usual grumpy state and very short stacked.

Then we have some excitement. Sort of. Spurdog AI, Osprey AI, and Foxtrap makes the call on the flop, so he must have A5 at least! Indeed, he has A high, Spurdog has 9 10 for the up & downer and Osprey has middle pair with his BANIN. ALL HAIL THE ONE TRUE HAND!! And, of course, the pair holds up. Well played Osprey. Spurdog is a dead dog.

The late Goth is AIPF with A 10. The Pirate Sloth, who's been unusually quiet thus far, wakes up to find AK and makes the call. No help so Goth Tom departs, not looking too happy. For a change.

Cardtrixx meanwhile continues to wield her short stack with some skill, and a lot of luck, and trebles up with a straight on the river.

Stripypussy's AIPF with K7, the Fisherman has a big stack now so calls with K10 and stripy gets no help. He's Oot.

Wizard's AIPF for his last 1225. Blinds are 250/500 and he gets no caller.

Cardtrixx is AIPF again for her last 625 and gets 2 callers. Foxtrap & Al. Cardtrixx has flopped and A and a J for 2 pair with her AJ. Sadly Foxtrap has pockets aces, again, and she's gone. Luckily for her I'm available to console her on the rail.

Flop comes 10 8 J. Abakus bets 1k with Q 10 and Pecker moves all in for another 525 with 66. Abakus makes the call and Pecker's off to the bar.

We're on the final table and Al shoves with AK and Osprey calls with 9 10.........and makes a straight.

Pirate moves all in with his monster - A7 soooooooooooooooooooooooted and Foxtrap calls with A10, no help so sloth's gone.

Crocket's all in now as the blinds get steep with A9, and the Fisherman calls with A9 to leave Crocket drawing very thin. The 9 on the river is rather unnecessary.

Foxtrap is the shortstack now having donked away most of his chips....and is AI with 8 2. The Fisherman calls with something better and Foxtrap's away. But luckily for him he has won a prize as The Wizard has decreed that he is the worthy recipient of Derek for this week. A decision greeted with unanimous approval from everyone at his table.

Thornback's AI with his 9 10 sooooooooooooooted. Neil makes the fishy call with 10 3. He of course hits a 3 on the turn to send Thornback to the rail.

Bubbletime.......

Flop 8 3 2 Wizard's all in with his AA. Neil calls with K3. And the 3 comes on the turn this time, much to the Wizard's delight.


Osprey's very short and is all in with J7. Abakus has Q 10. Q on the flop & Osprey's gone to leave a father & daughter to fight it out.

We have a flop of AJ6 and Abakus is all in with her A7. Neil calls with J3. Guess what pops up on the turn?? Yes another Fing 3. We have a Fisherman winner.

1. Fisherman
2. Abakus
3. Osprey

4. Wizard
5. Thornback
6. Foxtrap
7. Crocket
8. Pirate Sloth
9. Al
10. Pecker
11. Cardtrixx
12. Stripymccatpussy
13. Goth Tom
14. Spurdog
15. Somerled
16. Mrs T
17. Quackers

[Somerled]

14th September 2009 20 Runners

3 New Faces this week – Junior Beast, BigNeillyP and Dozy (Richard from Beauly)


1st Hand on table one....3 limpers so Eira raises to 300 from the button. Spurdog moves all in after his initial limp.....Eira makes the call. Spurdog proudly shows his pocket 10's and Eira has the mighty AJ. The 10 on the flop seals Quackers' fate and she takes an early bath. Quite an image that!!

The board has AA55 (2 clubs) Stripy moves all in.......The Wizard calls. They must both have an ace we all think...but no. Stripycat has an ace but Alex has K 10 clubs for the irrelevant flush draw. He's oot.

Big Neilly P then hits a straight on the river. Unfortunately for him, and his chips, Stripy had already made his flush on the turn.

Finally we have some action from table 2 where it would appear that everyone's been sleeping so far, Crocket is taken out by Al. No idea what happened but probably not very exciting.

I''ve been plodding along with an ever-diminishing stack and I'm allin for my last 1175 with wee quackers. Called by A6 in the paws of junior beast. Amazingly I have him covered but the 2's hold up. So I survive, much to everyone's delight. And Junior Beast leaves us in 16th.

Dozy's getting short now and is all in. Mrs T has to call from the BB with 5 2, but Richard's pocket 10's hold up.

Dozy's all in again, and Spurdog makes the call. I have 10 10so shove all in for an extra 2kish. Spurdog makes the call again. Dozy has the German Virgin (9 9) and Spurdog the monster that is KJ. I'm looking in good shape, that's a first, and even better when an unnecessary 10 lands on the river. Richard Dozy leaves us in 15th. (Sadly I was too busy stacking his chips to say goodbye but thanks for coming!!)

Foxtrap's all in for 975 & Stripy makes the call. Foxtrap has A5 (he does love his raggy aces) and Stripy 5 3. Flop comes A 9 4 and the 2 on the turn has Stripy running around the room celebrating until the 3 on the river splits the pot. Choppity Chop.

Foxtrap's forced all in blind. And amazingly makes a straight on the river. But sadly it's not enough as Mrs T has a flush.

All the action players are on table 1 but a brief moment of excitement on table 2 as Wirvine, or Mr Sheen as he should be called as he's so keen on Polish....., has AK v Osprey's all in Q6. The AK holds up and wirvine claims a much needed bounty as he can't afford to buy beer after all his holidays this year.

Then word reaches us that Al has tamed the beast on table 2 as well so it seems like they've woken up just in time for the final table.

Spurdog needs chips to make that final table and gets a monster hand – the Banin – and shoves all in accordingly. Ross has a mere AK and makes the call, and is devestated to find his hand so comprehensively dominated by the One True Hand, 7 8 offsuit. Sadly by some cruel twist of fate the AK manages to win the hand and Spurdog's our final table bubbler.

I raise from early position with AJ,Jay moves all in for less than my raise and it's folded round to Thornback who moves all in. For all my chips AJ doesn't look so hot any more so I fold weakly. Jay has 10 10 and Thornback has AA. The rockets hold up so we lose Jay and I sit smugly congratulating myself on a splendid fold while everyone else tells me to shut up.

Pecker's still here. But has not many chips. So he's allin with 9 10. Wirvine calls with KQ and Pecker is off to the bar.

Mrs T is allin with JQ sooooooooooooooooooted and GothTom has to call with his meagre stack with 8 9. No help for him so we are now Gothless.

Wirvine's all in for 5.2k Ross has already invested 2.4k with his speculative preflop raise so has to call. He has QJ, wirvine has K10. The J on the turn sends wirvine to the rail moaning about bad calls.


Flop comes 8 10 6 and Fran's all in with JJ. Al makes the ambitious call with his Q8 and Mrs T holds her breath as the 9 on the turn and the ultimate brick 2 falls on the river. Al's Oot.


Then a big hand, for me anyway. The Pirate (who's managed to fold his way this far, including an excellent preflop fold of 55 when I'd raised with 33) is all in with 9 9. Thornback is also all in with AQ and Mrs T has them both covered and has AK. When the A & K fall on the flop I can start to count my 3rd place prize money. Thornback is our bubbleboy.

Ross shoves from the SB. I look down to find 88 and happily call. Until he flips his cards with KK. I'm oot.


So it's Mrs T v Mr T in the HU. It's not long before we're AIPF. Mrs T KQ, Stripy AQ. 7.......j........Q........6.......and a 3 on the river means we have a pussy for a champion. Well played stripymccatpuss.

1.Stripymccatpuss
2.Mrs T
3.Somerled

4.Thornback
5.Pirate
6.Al
7.Wirvine
8.GothTom
9.Pecker
10.Jay

11.Spurdog
12.The Beast
13.Osprey
14.Foxtrap
15.Dozy (Richard)
16.Junior Beast
17.Crocket
18.BigNeillyP
19.Wizard
20.Quackers

It was decided that Quackers should have Derek as she went out in the 1st hand with AJ, although she did face very tough competition from Wizard & The Pirate who deserve dishonourable mentions in the Donkey Stakes.

[Somerled]

Monday 28th September 15 Runners

After the mayhem of Beer Festival week it was back to the “normality” of Monday night poker. 15 brave souls turned up to pit their wits against the newly crowned beer festival champ – Crocket – and numerous quality players. It would truly take some outstanding play to win this one.

We had a new arrival this week – Gary – S African bloke who is apparently the head chef, manager, handyman, gardener, housekeeper and accounts manager at the Polmaily Hotel – which is open again. With his standard and style of play, as well as general attitude he seems a ready made replacement for the notsodearlymissed Burger.

Quackers leaves us early doors as her raise with 3 3 is called by gary who has the monster that is 5 7.

Next to go is Al as his 10 10 runs into Thornback and his Cowboys.Yee Hah!! K on the flop was unnecessarily nasty.

Then wirvine,making a rare appearance as ambreambre was relegated to bar duties, makes it a brief appearance when his move with J7 is called by Gary who, for the first time, actually has a hand – AQ.

Then we have an exciting hand on Table 1. I have QJ and the board comes K 10 4. I check to Spurdog on the button and he beets 500. He only has nearly 2k left so I shove all in. He calls with top pair and an 8 kicker. The A on the turn is a thing of beauty, but not for Spurdog, as he heads to the rail.

Now I have some chips so its time to get active! Richard (Dozy) is in the BB and short stacked. Folded to me in the SB with K7 so I shove.He calls with A2. This time I manage to hit a flush on the turn, very skillfully.

Next hand Mrs T is in the BB, she's short too, no SB. Folded to me on the button with Q7. I raise she calls. Flop comes Q 7 4 and she shoves. One of the easier calls for me to make. She has K2 and there's to be no miracle to save her.

FINAL TABLE

Gary leaves us. Crocket has 2 pair and is all in on the turn. Gary makes the call with a flush draw,and fails to hit.

Stripy's managed to get some chips and is sitting in 2nd place. He raises UTG to 1500 (250 500) I have QQ. ALL IN. He calls with AK. Sadly, for him, he doesn't hit and is oot as I gain a morsel of revenge for Sunday!!

Foxtrap then gets a much needed double up from me as his KK beats my AK. The A on the river not being enough as he's hit the case K on the flop.

The Osprey moves in UTG. I fold 55 after much pain. Foxtrap calls, he has KQ v Osprey's A 10. K on the river is enough for Foxtrap.

Blinds are now 350 700 as Pecker moves allin for 2325 from the Sb with me in the BB with A9. I call. He has K4. I hit the 9 and it's enough.

The Wizard moves all in for his last 400, having wisely folded the previous hand to my Banin Button Raise. He has AJ, Crocket has 10 10. The 10 on the flop is cruel. But not for Crocket as he hoovers up more chips.

Thornback is now AIPF from the SB. It's only 600 more for me to call so I call blind. I have K7, he has J2. K on the turn means he's drawing dead and he's our bubble boy for today.

Final 3 Foxtrap has about 16200, I have 18k and Crocket about 12k. 3 handed play goes on for quite a while with much exchanging of chips. Foxtrap's left a bit short after an exchange with Crocket and moves all in with 77. I call from the BB with A 10 sooooooooooooooooted, and hit a lucky flush on the turn.

So we're set for a long and tense HU battle. Or alternatively we could just chuck the chips in straight away. I raise with K8, Crocket shoves and I call, well they were soooooted. He has 33. Flop of K 8 10 is nice and the 6 on the turn followed by the J on the river gives me a long overdue victory, as Crocket follows up his Beer Festival win with a runners up spot to prove it wasn't a complete fluke. So there will be a double bounty on me next week!

1. Somerled
2. Crocket
3. Foxtrap

4. Thornback
5. Wizard
6. Pecker
7. Osprey
8, Stripymccatpuss
9. Gary

10.Mrs T
11. Dozy
12. Spurdog
13. Wirvine
14. Al
15. Quackers

[Somerled]

5th October – 13 Runners

Just 13 hardy souls braved the dark night this Monday. Everyone was most upset that our South African friend didn't come this week but at least that meant there was room for some poker to be played.

As a result it was level 3 before we lost a player when the flop came down 10 4 8 and Crocket decided that his A4 was probably good. Unfortunately Spurdog had woken up with A 10. Crocket was sent to the rail.

Dozy had done well this week to nearly last until the break but then his KJ soooooooted encountered Spurdog's pocket Cowboys, he is quite fond of Cowboys I believe, and despite flopping a flush draw the turn & river brought no salvation so it was off back to Beauly once again. The good news is that if he turns up for another 63 consecutive weeks he will be classed as a local.

Thornback then felt it was time to join the Banin Cult. Unfortunately he doesn't yet, as a mere novice, possess the necessary faith to wield the One True Hand properly and lost to Eira's A3.

I was quite emotional after this episode of poor Banin play and it threw me off my stride completely as I pushed on a J 10 8 flop with my Q 10 sooooooted only for Spurdog to smugly reveal his pocket aces. The rascal. I'm oot.

Stripycat moves all in from the button with his pocket 3's. Spurdog calls from the BB and continues his reign of death as the board comes K Q x and another K on the turn.

Final Table time

Pecker is first to go as Quackers hits 2 pair. Details are sketchy at this point as I was in the process of destroying Messrs Thornback, Crocket and Stripycat on the “losers” table.

Mrs T then goes out with a whimper as she's all in with Nein Nein and ambreambre has A8. An 8 on the flop gives ambre hope and a second one on the river is cruel but entertaining all the same.

Spurdog then donks off most of his chips to the other big stack, Quackers, as he has a massive top pair but sadly for him she has flopped a set of 9's. Spurdog is still alive though. Sadly.

Wizard's still here too. And he's allin for his last 100 chips from the SB. Bruce is also allin with his paltry remains with 7 7, and Eira is compelled to call with her A 10. Wizard has J8 and is very excited with a flop of J85. Whilst he's dancing around the room the turn comes an innocuous 4 and when the 6 lands on the river it takes a moment or 2 for it to sink in that Spurdog has hit a miracle runner runner straight to dismiss the Wizard's magic for this week. It would appear that he's more of a Paul Daniels than a Gandalf.

The Osprey is still lingering around nursing his wee stack. He shoves all in with K9 and Al calls with A8. The 9 lands on the flop but Al then proceeds to hit a straight on the river to send The Osprey off to his nest.

It's now bubbletime and Eira has about 70% of the chips. She & Al are involved – but only in a card playing way – as the flop comes down 6 8 9. Eira has the Banin and is all in. Al makes the call and is theoretically ahead with A8. However, Eira clearly has The Faith in abundance and is rewarded when the 5 comes on the turn. ALL HAIL THE ONE TRUE HAND!! A thing of beauty indeed. So Al, the unbeliever, is out on the bubble.

Spurdog is our wee fella in the chip stakes, and is all in with QJ. Ambre has him beaten with K10 until the board comes Q4872. Spurdog survives.

Then he's all in again with A6 – he does love raggy aces – and Eira calls for about 1% of her stack with 9 2. The board now comes 7 J Q 10.........and the 2 on the river is just sweeeet. Spurdog's out, but has a tenner to console himself as well as his Bounty Pint for knocking me out. Which he seemed to savour greatly.

So, we have the 2 ladies HU. A bit of girl on girl action – or girl on granny action anyway.Quackers has a huge chip lead but ambreambre doubles up twice with Q8>K10 and A9>A5 to put her in the lead.

Then Eira's AIPF with A5 and ambre is crushed when she calls and shows a measly Q2. The board comes 6 8 2 K and on the river we have a blank K which hands an amazing victory to ambreambre. And she was supposed to be working too!!

Other than Spurdog there were no real donkey plays tonight so Derek remains in the bar for now.


1.ambreambre
2.Quackers
3.Spurdog

4.Al
5.Osprey
6.Wizard
7.Mrs T
8.Pecker

9.Stripymccatpuss
10.Somerled
11.Thornback
12.Dozy
13.Crocket